It is a great time to be in IT. And developing websites is a lot of fun. And a lot easier these days. I started building websites back in 1996. When the most advanced HTML editor was Notepad. And CSS was an acronym from a bad action movie. But one thing has remained the same. The fact that we often work long hours. And that this can make our spouses become “Webmaster Widows”. In this article, I’m going to provide some tips on how to avoid this.
The first tip is to recognize that your job is not your life. And it’s not a hobby. And while we may have to put in long hours occasionally, now that you are married, it shouldn’t be the only thing you do.
The next tip is that when you are with your spouse, make sure you are 100% present. Put the phone down. Even if it’s just hanging out to watch their favorite TV show for an hour or two. If there is a work emergency – they will call you. Otherwise, you can go without email or social media updates.
In particular, when you are a newlywed, find something you like to do as a couple as a hobby. This could be something as simple as watching movies. Or hiking. Or gardening. Or volunteering at a soup kitchen. Just make sure it’s not something with computers and something you can truly do with each other.
Learn how to either get up earlier if you must put in extra hours for work or side project. This will mean learning to go to sleep earlier. Here is why I prefer to get up earlier than staying up later. The reason is that in the morning you are fresher. And even if you must be in contact with overseas – this still work better instead of being up late. Plus typically your spouse is still asleep. And I’m saying this from experience. I used to stay up until 1-2 AM working. Now, I try to get up at 5. Because I like to make sure I have an hour to myself before any work or side-project stuff.
Getting married is a joyful time. And when we work with Internet technologies, we often get flexibility. And the ability to work from home. Unfortunately, that means we often work alone and long hours. Make sure you are mindful of this and don’t turn your spouse into a “Webmaster Widow”. And I hope these tips help you have a stronger relationship.